Smile Back: Part Four
by Minisinoo
TERRIBLY VEXED
Scott:
Monday Morning Meeting is supposed to be a blow-out valve on the pressure cooker of seven young adults living and working in close proximity under one roof, most of whom have different ideas of what constitutes "clean up the den" or "don't hog the computer room." Not to mention the eternal war over the toilet seat.
Hey, I'm polite. I put it back down when I'm done.
When it had been only Jean and I living here with the professor, life had been uncomplicated. The most serious quarrel we'd ever had was over Jean's tendency to drink the last Coke and not put any more in the fridge to get cold. That had really pissed me off. If I can put down the toilet seat for her, she can put more Coke in the fridge for me. But aside from that, we hadn't quarreled.
Add four more people, from four very different backgrounds, and uncomplicated goes to hell in a handcart.
It took a month of steadily building complaints and a few verbal sparring matches before the professor finally instituted Monday Morning Meeting. Or The Grievance Hour, as Hank dubbed it almost immediately. Crumb Cake, Coffee, and Complaints, was Jean's version.
The first few meetings had involved a lot of Scream and Leap, with me stuck in the middle trying to mediate -- until they all ganged up on me, and The Grievance Hour turned into the Bash Cyclops Hour. Now that we're all getting used to each other's idiosyncrasies, however, meetings have calmed down. That doesn't mean a fight never erupts.
"He takes too damn long in the shower, and then all the hot water is used up!"
Henry McCoy, complaining about Peter.
"I do not!" Peter replies. "A shower's a shower! Maybe if you *got up* sooner, you wouldn't be the last one in!"
"Maybe if you'd take yours *at night*, you could take as long as you want. You're worse than the girls!"
"Hey!" Jean snaps. "Watch it."
And I say, "Define 'a long time.'"
"He's in there twenty minutes!"
"Yeah, well, maybe I shampoo my hair and scrub under my arms, unlike you Beastie Boy."
"Sounds to me," says Wolverine from a corner of the kitchen, "like Petie's having a shower and a little morning jack-off. Easier to clean up the mess that way."
Dead silence greets that observation, and I'm not sure who's more embarrassed -- Peter, me, Hank, or the girls. At least Bobby's still home with his parents. The professor says nothing -- which is par for the course -- and Wolverine continues to clean his goddamn nails with one of his fist-knives. Of course, Wolverine is probably *right*, but . . . . "'Why' isn't the issue, Logan. The length of time is the issue." I catch the professor suppress a smile. Score one for Cyclops.
"Maybe Petie just needs a little action."
Peter twists to look at Logan. "Are you volunteering, Wolverine?"
It takes real will-power not to laugh at Logan's expression. I and the professor are the only ones who manage. But the Wolverine rallies and grins slyly. "You're not my type, Ruskie."
Peter affects a grand sigh. "Too bad. All the good ones are straight."
Composure is out the window now. Even I can't not laugh at that. When things calm down again, I say, "Peter, don't make me put a timer in the bathroom, okay, man?"
"I hear the pot calling the kettle black. I'm not the only guy who takes a long time in the shower, eh, *Cyclops*?"
"He has a point," Hank adds.
"I'm in there and out before most of you are even *awake*," I reply, starting to get annoyed.
"Well," says Hank, "I think we ought to put a time limit on everybody. Ten minutes. That's it."
"I shower at night," Ororo pipes up. "My hair has to dry."
"You don't count," Hank tells her.
"Unfair!" Peter yelps. "No grace for the girlfriend, Beastie Boy. If it's a time limit, it's a time limit for *everybody*."
"Guys," I say, "No time limits. Just . . . think about the next person, okay?"
"What's wrong with ten minutes?" Hank asks. "I can shower in five."
"Well, I can't! I have to shave!" Jean snaps.
"Shave some time other than in the morning, then."
"Fuck you, Henry."
**Language, Jean,** the professor says mildly.
I just shake my head. "No. We're not doing time limits."
"Ten minutes too short for you, pretty boy?" Henry's teasing me, but it has an edge. He may not know what went on between Ororo and I in Nashville, or Japan, but he's not completely oblivious to the fact that I stutter more when Ro's in a room. Henry's anything but stupid.
I glance helplessly at the professor, who, understanding, sits forward to intervene. Ororo beats him to it. "Give Scott a break, guys. None of you has to shower blind. Try it some time; it's not easy."
That stops the argument cold, but what she'd said surprised me more. Later, I find a minute to approach her. "What did you mean 'try it some time; it's not easy'?"
We're in the upper hallway on the mezzanine overlooking the main entry. Anyone can see us talking, but that doesn't matter. I try not to be alone with her. We haven't had a reading lesson since we got back, but she doesn't really need me any longer. She can read. Not fast, but she can read. And she practices; that, I make sure of. Now, arms crossed, she looks away, down to the entry below. "I wanted to see what you have to go through, so I tried showering and getting dressed once with my eyes closed. I didn't expect it to be that hard. I knocked the bathroom cup in the sink and almost broke it."
"You get used to doing it after a while," I say, mostly because I can't think of anything else. She gives a little shrug and moves past me. I call after, "Ro!" and she looks back. "Thanks." She shrugs again, but smiles at me. It sends a weak-water flash through my bones.
back to Min's stories | Cyke and Logan archive | comicfic.net