Fruitloops, Nutcases And Prophets: Part Two
by Diamonde
"I don't understand it. He's perfectly normal." The professor looked at Jean worriedly. "There's nothing wrong with him, he's just seeing people that aren't there."
Scott sighed. "They were there, it's just that nobody else can see them." He was ignored.
"Storm will have to take over leading the X-Men, I'm afraid. It just isn't safe."
"Good luck to her, she's really gonna need it." Scott looked around the room boredly while they discussed possible psychological problems. There was something wrong. He opened his mouth to say 'has that tree always been there' then thought better of it. He knew that it hadn't, otherwise the professor would have put his desk somewhere else. "You might want to get Wolverine in here."
"Why?" Jean asked, the picture of patience.
"He'll get rid of that tree that's messing up your bookcase."
They both looked at the bookcase. "Scott, there are no trees in this room."
"Yes there is."
"He does believe that he's seeing a tree, professor."
"Well then." In a slightly patronising tone of voice, Professor Xavier continued. "Look at the tree, Scott."
"I am looking at it, if I wasn't I wouldn't have mentioned it."
"What type of tree is it?"
"A big one." He looked at the ceiling. "What's up there again?"
"Robert's room. Is it his tree?"
"How the hell should I know, it's just a tree." He cupped his hands and shouted at the ceiling. "HEY BOBBY!"
"What?" came back faintly.
"Is there a tree up there?"
There was a pause. "What sort of tree?"
"A big leafy one."
"Uh, no. There's the little one that Storm gave me, but that's it."
"Thanks anyway." Scott looked back at the bookcase. "Oh, it's gone now. Don't worry about it."
"…Good. Well, why don't you go see if breakfast is ready yet. I'll have a few calls to make." Jean took Scott's arm and steered him out of the room.
"You think I'm crazy, don't you?" he said conversationaly.
"No, not at all. There are lots of perfectly logical explanations."
"Like?"
"Stress, or maybe one of the telepathic… interferences you've had in the past is showing up again."
"But I don't feel stressed, and if it was something from D'Spayre or whoever then you would have noticed." He saw Jean's expresison and decided to shut _right_ up. "But of course, I'm not a very good judge right now and you're probably right."
Breakfast was an odd meal. For a start, they had to inform Storm that she would be taking over the team and that Scott was temporarily retiring from active duty.
"Why? I do hope there's nothing wrong withour fearless leader." Beast looked concerned.
"He's seein' people dat ain't dere," said Gambit tactfully.
Bobby looked interested. "Is that why you were asking if there was a tree in my room?"
"Yeah. There was, you just didn't see it." For some reason Scott wasn't as worried about his mental health as Jean was. He knew that he still felt quite sane, and the professor had said that he was. Surely he'd stop seeing the whatevertheyweres soon, then everything would be normal again.
"Seeing anything now?"
He looked around. "Yes. You, Jean, everyone else, the kitchen, a window, breakfast… nothing that shouldn't be here." He looked at Jean's breakfast. "Are you going to eat that last pancake?"
"Have it."
"Thanks sweetheart." He was halfway through the pancake when he saw something that shouldn't be there, but most definitely was. Training and instinct acted fast, and he ducked under his chair. "Everybody had better move!" he yelled as an afterthought.
Everyone else looked around at the normal kitchen. "Why?" Beast asked.
"What's the name of that big dinosaur with the flippers and the really long neck? On the tip of my tongue…"
"A plesiosaur?"
"That's it. Well, there's one of those swimming through and if you aren't careful the tail's going to take your head off."
"There are no dinosaurs in here, Scottie. They're exitnct, remember?"
"Of course _I_ remember, you idiot, tell _it_ that!"
"I would if I could, but it isn't here."
Scott peeked up over the table. "Hmm, you're right. It's gone." He sat back in his place and proceeded to finish Jean's breakfast. Then they all watched in horrified fascination as he turned and began to speak to the back door. "I suppose, if you like rain."
Jean looked upset. "Honey, there's nobody-"
Wolverine opened the door and walked in, dripping. "Nice weather, isn't it?" Everybody else paused as they tired to make sense of the conversation.
Scott didn't miss a beat, he knew exactly what was going on and found it rather disgusting. "See Jean, I told you. He does shake in the house. You're cleaning that up, Logan."
Wolverine thought again about the idea he'd just had and decided to get a towel instead.
They were discussing him. Scott knew they were, it was blindingly obvious. They thought they were being sneaky, but no matter how many strange things he was seeing he could still think quite well. _Hmph. I'm perfectly fine, I don't see why I should have to do all these stupid file updates while they're talking about me._ He kicked away from the computer. The upstairs computer that they'd linked into Cerebro's personnel files just so that he could use it without getting his psychotic self near any irreplaceable equipment. _Screw this for a game of toy soldiers. If I'm going to be insane, I may as well get to do what I want. It's eleven, time for a little smackerel of something. I'll get back to the files later._ Sense of duty sent packing, Scott smiled to himself and headed for the kitchen. He was feeling incredibly hungry today.
Second snack finished, he was just cleaning up when a duck walked through the kithen. _Better grab that, don't want the little pest crapping inside._ With the stealth and skill of a career X-Man he crept up behind his feathered quarry. The duck made a small clucking noise and walked faster. Scott tiptoed behind it, ready for a swift, silent leap. Suddenly, without provocation, the duck quacked loudly and fluttered back over his head and up the stairs. That was the beginning.
After ten minutes Scott was still chasing this apparently paranoid schitzophrenic duck. He'd gotten it back downstairs, but now it was heading for the lower levels. "Come back here you little bastard!" he hissed. The duck ignored him and quacked its way into the war room. Caught up in his hunt, Scott ignored the startled X-Men and looked for the duck. It had to be in here somewhere. He dropped onto his knees, looking for anywhere it might have hidden. Not under the table, not hiding underneath Storm's ankle-length skirt…
"Scott? What are you doing in here?"
Scott looked up, they were all giving him looks that said in very few words that they certainly hadn't seen a duck. "…What am I doing in here? I've lost something, and from the way you're all looking at me I have a horrible suspicion that it's my mind."
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